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He said that if he'll do that, then he's in for the news.
Howard asked Roni if Robin has been able to maintain her weight without her.
He said he hated the Blackberry because the phone sucked so bad.
He knows that he has to save it for next time though because he knows he'll want to see more of it when he needs to beat off again.
Robin said that the diet is about watching what you eat and the detox was a natural thing based on fruits and vegetables so there shouldn't be anything wrong with that.
He said that he and Ross were trying to have a conversation and this guy was sitting with him.
Howard said Beth was out last night so he figured he'd run off a batch to make himself tired.
Artie said that he's been in situations like that himself and he has people putting him on the phone with people who hardly even know who he is.
He explained how bad the movie was and how this other chick comes and tries to pick her up.
Howard said they have some bugs to work out on the phone but you can watch video and listen to it as a regular iPod.
He said that they've canceled meetings and phone calls and it wasn't just the one time.
Howard said that Ronnie is another one who was changed by the show.
He said that he's not sure how they're going to do it now.
He made up some conversations he might have on the phone with these random calls he'd make.
Keith if Artie could be a father over the phone.
He said that there were chicks there.
He mentioned the Darth Nihilus guy and the Gamorrean guard doing impressions of them.
The guy who played the original Cousin It was there and got upset about him not coming.
He was getting drunk all night and throwing darts around.
'' Artie said that he's had that movie for at least a dozen years.
He said the guy is all old and tired.
He said he didn't call Gary over the weekend to yell at him.
JD said he doesn't think he has.
'' that sounded very similar to Jim's retarded character.
Artie said that he went out on a date with a chick on Saturday and had to beat off after because he didn't get laid.
He said that the people at Rescue Me sent him one as a gift and he thinks it looks really cool.
He said that they've canceled meetings and phone calls and it wasn't just the one time.
Howard said he didn't need to go there.
advertisement More With Ralph Vs.
He said that he went out with some of the guys from the show to celebrate Jason's engagement.
The guys said that Special Ed had a harder job than even Jeff the Drunk ever did.
He said that if he'll do that, then he's in for the news.
Robin said she can't see it being a comfortable thing for Artie or the woman.
He had to get Ralph back because Howard had just hung up on him thinking they weren't going to get him.
Howard said he once asked Mark Chernoff to grow a Hitler moustache back when he was on K-Rock.
JD came in so Howard told him to get some confidence and just talk to some chicks.
Howard made fun of him by comparing him to the Star Wars guys they've interviewed recently.
Brandon Is Willing To Do Anything To Sit In On The Show.
Keith said that he just can't see Artie having a wife and kid like he wants to.
James even did a ''Yay!
Keith said that he just can't see Artie having a wife and kid like he wants to.
He just missed that one phone call that day.
He said that he likes some of the features it has but he's not sure he wants to get one.
Dominic Barbara called in and said he thinks that Bubba is going to kick his ass when he sees him.
He said that the guy was a nice guy and he didn't want to be rude so he let him stay there.
Artie Wrap Up Show Clips.
Howard said he could hear Dave asking him about his moustache and he'd have to tell him that he'd like it to be called the Howard moustache instead of a Hitler moustache.
Howard said that it seems like Artie might not like people getting too close to him.
Artie said that he went out on a date with a chick on Saturday and had to beat off after because he didn't get laid.
Artie asked Richard if he got wasted that day.
Howard thanked Special Ed for calling in and let him go.
Howard asked the guy about going to school and how he was left back while all of the other kids moved on.
He said he realized that he does have a type like the guys on the show say, she's a bartender at a club in Jersey.
He said that the guy was a nice guy and he didn't want to be rude so he let him stay there.
He said they can do that all day Friday and all day Saturday.
He said that came off as her being a phony.
Ralph said that is why and he's kind of soured over Bubba right now.
Robin mentioned JD and Howard still stuck with Fred.
Roni talked about the things Robin is eating and drinking now.
Ralph said that is why and he's kind of soured over Bubba right now.
He read that Imus is looking to get back on the air but he can't imagine why the guy would want to keep working at that age.
Richard said the dart board was in a really high traffic area too and people had to duck under it when people were throwing darts.
He gets his from work and doesn't keep them all.
Artie said that he was supposed to chat with Keith on the day he was doing Conan.
Artie said that a bunch of the guys from SIRIUS were there at the bar where the guys were celebrating.
Keith said that Artie could be a great father and he really believes that he could do a good job at it.
Only Artie understood what he said so he had to interpret.
Howard said he's going to stick with Fred as being the one who has changed the most.
Roni talked about the things Robin is eating and drinking now.
Howard said he just did the math on that over the weekend and figured that he's marrying someone too old.
He said it'll probably take him a year to get through that movie at the rate he goes through them.
Howard started off the show talking about how he beat off to Carmen Luvana last night.
Keith said that Artie has a huge heart and he thinks that if Artie never experiences fatherhood, he's going to miss out on a lot.
Howard said that Tom is a good actor and people tend to forget that based on his wacky behavior.
Ralph didn't seem worried about that.
He described the scene and how Jenna was on this Roman pillar thing and these guys are doing really bad accents.
Keith Ablow so he had a surprise for him this morning.
He said that he wants to open a bar where they have a firing range.
Lew, Upset Over Interview.
Ralph told Bubba that he was the one who started the whole shoe thing, he just called in to chime in.
He said that JD doesn't invite anyone to talk to him and no chick is going to go up to him and start a conversation.
He went on to say that the movie is called ''Panty Drawer''  and all of the chicks in the movie are hot.
He said that a guy who keeps every Playboy in plastic is really weird.
Howard said that's funny that Lee Majors is a big draw like that.
Robin said that your hands are all over that screen all day long too.
Jon Hein got back to his Wrap Up Show preview and said they'd be talking about Charlie Murphy's visit as well.
The guys talked about Hitler and some history about him.
Howard told Jeff to take care of himself.
Howard said it turns out Lee Majors had to film a movie that weekend and wasn't able to make it.
Robin mentioned JD and Howard still stuck with Fred.
'' Howard got back to his jerking off story and told the guys he was in his chair naked and beating off to the Carmen Luvana movie.
Ralph said he may have overreacted that morning.
Howard told him he could come in if he brought his mother in and waxed her.
Howard wondered just what ''anything'' is.
Robin told a story about how she had a guy tell her how nice her car was one time and then followed her home.
JD said he didn't think that any of the chicks that were there were all that attractive.
Howard also spent some time talking about Don Imus after reading in the paper that he may be close to a settlement with CBS.
Howard talked about how he was using a Blackberry for a while but now he's using a Treo.
He said it was a really weird move to make but he doesn't really care because he's not expecting a long term relationship.
He said that he went out with some of the guys from the show to celebrate Jason's engagement.
He said he hated the Blackberry because the phone sucked so bad.
Howard said that Fred rarely travels or invites anyone over.
Artie said he can see Howard blogging in his future instead of doing a radio show.
Artie asked Gary if he could move all of his music from his iPod to this new iPhone.
He said he realized that he does have a type like the guys on the show say, she's a bartender at a club in Jersey.
Richard said he likes those guys who grow really long moustaches and curl them at the ends.
He figured he'd just do it while he was sitting at his desk instead of waiting for his TV screen to drop down and all of that.
Artie and Howard were coming up with more pong ideas.
He gets his from work and doesn't keep them all.
They could do that and work as little as possible.
Richard said he likes those guys who grow really long moustaches and curl them at the ends.
Howard said he feels that his creepy factor is down compared to some guys.
He's got one that Jenna Jameson is in and how the guys in the movie are all doing really bad accents in it.
Gary said he'd take care of it.
He knows that he has to save it for next time though because he knows he'll want to see more of it when he needs to beat off again.
He said that all hot bartender chicks wear them.
She said that they found he had a bunch of porn videos in his house.
Gary said he'd take care of it.
Artie asked Richard if he got wasted that day.
Howard brought up this iPhone thing that Artie mentioned earlier.
A guy who has a Real Doll or one who saves his porno.
Howard let her come in even though he was trying to get out of there.
He said it was a really weird move to make but he doesn't really care because he's not expecting a long term relationship.
Howard told Jeff to take care of himself.
He said he keeps them for a long time and doesn't get rid of them.
He didn't have anything negative to say about the guy.
He said they can do that all day Friday and all day Saturday.
James even did a ''Yay!
Robin noticed that he has very big hands and pointed that out to the guys.
JD told Howard that he doesn't talk to anyone he doesn't know so that's why he doesn't meet new chicks.
Artie said that they're going to be at this club out there and the chicks are going to be unreal.
'' Artie suggested ''Handi-Pong'' which might work too.
He said that he didn't get laid the first night so he wants to go on a second date.
Brandon agreed to it immediately.
Artie went on to say that he thinks that he's still in love with Dana.
Howard said she probably just wanted a plug.
The guys said that's all gay though.
He said he was just talking to people he knew.
Howard said that Carmen Luvana has been on the show a couple of times and Benjy once had his toe inside of her.
Fred said that he would put Jackie in that discussion because his life really got changed when he was on the show.
He said he's sure he could get laid like that but Robin said that would mess up his look.
He sent them a letter and claimed that he'd be willing to do anything to get in there.
Howard wondered why they'd have a dart board at a bar where people get drunk.
James Special Ed And Jeff The Drunk Call In.
Howard said she was on the show and he was going through his stash of porno and found that one to watch.
Some of his co-stars were upset that he didn't show up either.
Artie said that he hoped that it wasn't her boyfriend or something.
'' Howard called it the ''inner asshole'' but Fred wasn't going to go down that road with him.
Artie said that Richard's girlfriend is really good looking and he was talking to her about the trip they're going on where they're going to be staying in haunted houses and stuff.
Artie said that he was sitting there at the diner and this guy in a dirty hat and shirt was staring at him.
After that Howard came back and asked JD to tell Gary that it was too cold in there.
Artie said that the waxing has to be worse.
Howard said that Artie blowing off sessions is wrong and he really should try to make these things happen.
He said it would be very complicated.
Keith said that he just can't see Artie having a wife and kid like he wants to.
Robin mentioned JD and Howard still stuck with Fred.
Howard asked the guy about going to school and how he was left back while all of the other kids moved on.
He let him go a short time later and moved on to other stuff.
Howard said he does say hi to some fans and will shake a hand here or there but some of this stuff can get annoying.
He said that he likes some of the features it has but he's not sure he wants to get one.
The caller's name was James but Howard wanted him to call in as ''Special Ed'' which is Jim Florentine's character's name from Crank Yankers.
Howard said the next time he does Letterman he may just do this and tell him he's bringing back the moustache.
He's cut people out of his life, like his father, and he has no problem cutting Bubba out.
He said he's sure it will get better as the years go on.
Keith said that Artie has a huge heart and he thinks that if Artie never experiences fatherhood, he's going to miss out on a lot.
Howard said as long as he had Ralph on the phone he wanted to talk to him about what he said to Bubba's wife.
Robin said that your hands are all over that screen all day long too.
James Special Ed And Jeff The Drunk Call In.
Richard said he wasn't that bad.
Howard asked if they could call him ''Special Ed'' since he was in Special Ed.
Robin said that the diet is about watching what you eat and the detox was a natural thing based on fruits and vegetables so there shouldn't be anything wrong with that.
Bionic-Con Discussions.
Special Ed asked for his autograph so Howard put him on hold and told Gary to sign something for him.
Howard said he tried to get Bubba and Ralph back tother this weekend but that didn't happen.
Richard said he likes those guys who grow really long moustaches and curl them at the ends.
Howard had Jeff on the phone so he told Jeff he could push carts like Special Ed was.
Howard brought up this iPhone thing that Artie mentioned earlier.
Roni for coming in and said that Robin seems to be doing very well on the maintenance program.
Artie got back to his story about his date.
Howard said he's going to stick with Fred as being the one who has changed the most.
The guys said that's all gay though.
Artie mentioned that he got one of these new iPhone things.
Howard said they were going to tape ping pong paddles on his arm and play Wack Pong.
Howard said he could also just call random people on the phone and talk to them to vent.
He said that he didn't get laid the first night so he wants to go on a second date.
He's cut people out of his life, like his father, and he has no problem cutting Bubba out.
He said that's how hot the chicks were.
Richard said he wasn't that bad.
Howard said that they should have been there to do interviews, he would have loved to have spoken to the guy who played Cousin It.
Then, in the middle of his orgasm, he realized how disgusting it is and how disgusted he was with himself.
He didn't have anything negative to say about the guy.
Howard said he tried to get Bubba and Ralph back tother this weekend but that didn't happen.
Howard said that John Stamos could pull it off and get laid with that moustache.
Howard said that maybe they should have left that thing alone.
Robin said that it was very odd because the chick had to have told the guy that she was going on a date with Artie days before.
He said that one of the guys there has one and he was saying that his phone gets shut down whenever he gets an e-mail.
Gary said that they have the option to do something with Jeff to make some money.
JD told Howard that he doesn't talk to anyone he doesn't know so that's why he doesn't meet new chicks.
Bong Hit was doing his Jackie Puppet impression but Howard had to move on to some other stuff so he let him go.
After that Howard came back and asked JD to tell Gary that it was too cold in there.
He read through a few of the headlines and said that those guys are really funny over there.
They don't want to play darts like that.
Brandon agreed to it immediately.
Dominic Barbara called in and said he thinks that Bubba is going to kick his ass when he sees him.
Howard said he feels that his creepy factor is down compared to some guys.
The guys said that Special Ed had a harder job than even Jeff the Drunk ever did.
Howard said there was this other guy there who wanted to shake his hand when he was eating.
Artie said that he was supposed to chat with Keith on the day he was doing Conan.
Richard said he wasn't that bad.
Howard To Bring Back The Hitler Moustache?
Howard said that Tom is a good actor and people tend to forget that based on his wacky behavior.
Lew, Upset Over Interview.
Howard wondered just what ''anything'' is.
He said it was a really weird move to make but he doesn't really care because he's not expecting a long term relationship.
He said that he'd love to be able to check out his web site from wherever he's at.
Artie said that he's been in situations like that himself and he has people putting him on the phone with people who hardly even know who he is.
Jon Hein got back to his Wrap Up Show preview and said they'd be talking about Charlie Murphy's visit as well.
Jeff said that you have to collect a whole bunch of carts doing that job and he really can't do that with one arm.
Roni thanked Howard very much because they're getting thousands of e-mails and calls from the fans who need help losing weight.
He said that one of the guys there has one and he was saying that his phone gets shut down whenever he gets an e-mail.
Howard wondered what's creepier.
Artie said that he went out on a date with a chick on Saturday and had to beat off after because he didn't get laid.
Then the guy freaked out and couldn't believe he didn't want to make this deal with him that he was asking about.
He said that he and Gary were talking about Fred and how much he's changed over the years.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that Bubba can't bring his wife on the show and not expect her to get some shit.
Richard said he likes those guys who grow really long moustaches and curl them at the ends.
JD said he didn't think that any of the chicks that were there were all that attractive.
Robin said that JD was on his way to dying a virgin.
Howard said he just did the math on that over the weekend and figured that he's marrying someone too old.
Robin mentioned JD and Howard still stuck with Fred.
Robin said that the diet is about watching what you eat and the detox was a natural thing based on fruits and vegetables so there shouldn't be anything wrong with that.
Keith was there to talk to Artie live.
Richard Christy came in a short time later and told the guys about how he has a storage place there in the city and he's got boxes full of Playboys in there.
They don't want to play darts like that.
That caught his attention because it doesn't seem that way.
He said that's how hot the chicks were.
The caller's name was James but Howard wanted him to call in as ''Special Ed'' which is Jim Florentine's character's name from Crank Yankers.
Howard said he's going to stick with Fred as being the one who has changed the most.
He went on to say that the movie is called ''Panty Drawer''  and all of the chicks in the movie are hot.
Keith said that he just can't see Artie having a wife and kid like he wants to.
He said he saw Richard playing darts when he was leaving the bar the guys were at.
Brandon agreed to it immediately.
Howard said he feels that his creepy factor is down compared to some guys.
Then at the end of the conversation the owner asked him to talk to his partner who was in the hospital.
He said they're going to hang out at the pool all day Friday and there will be chicks all over the place.
Snores Through The News.
Artie asked who she is.
Gary told him that's very easy to do, you just hook it up to whatever computer you have your iTunes on.
Howard said they have some bugs to work out on the phone but you can watch video and listen to it as a regular iPod.
She said that what she's recommending to people won't kill them unless they abuse it.
Howard said he feels that his creepy factor is down compared to some guys.
He said that it's edited really poorly and they cut to other scenes.
They could do that and work as little as possible.
Howard read through some of The Onion's latest headlines which are pretty funny.
Howard wondered if Richard and Sal would be up for some ''Dong Pong'' where they hit the balls with their penises.
Howard thought it was kind of odd how he agreed to that so quickly.
He said that JD was just sitting there moping while everyone else was celebrating.
He saw a guy out the other night like that and figured he was really old school.
Howard read that some fans were really upset that Majors didn't show up.
The guys kept going, arguing back and forth about what went on.
He said he thinks that Ralph started the whole thing when he told her to change her shoes.
He said that the guy was really nice and picked up the tab but he wasn't looking for that.
JD told Howard that he doesn't talk to anyone he doesn't know so that's why he doesn't meet new chicks.
Bionic-Con Discussions.
He said that she didn't have a car with her at the diner so Luis must have driven her there to the diner.
Howard said there was this other guy there who wanted to shake his hand when he was eating.
Howard figures they'll come back on Monday and hear how JD just sat there doing nothing.
He said that he and Gary were talking about Fred and how much he's changed over the years.
He said he'd have to check with her on that but he thinks she might do it.
They could do that and work as little as possible.
Bionic-Con Discussions.
Howard asked Roni if Robin has been able to maintain her weight without her.
Artie thinks that Johnny Depp could pull it off too.
Howard told Artie that he has to be able to plan his own day instead of relying on someone else.
He told him to tell Gary to turn up the temperature a cunt hair.
Howard had some stuff to say about that phone but he had to take a break first.
Howard said she was on the show and he was going through his stash of porno and found that one to watch.
Howard also spent some time talking about Don Imus after reading in the paper that he may be close to a settlement with CBS.
Howard wondered if Brandon's mother is really hairy down there.
He said he's been thinking about doing a day or two once they leave.
He said that maybe she should have waited to see how the diet worked out long term.
He said he's still looking for the puppet and he's still not sure if it's been stolen.
Howard said that's funny that Lee Majors is a big draw like that.
He said that his future wife might be jumping around in the bouncy castle at Ronnie's block party.
Ralph said he was just agreeing with Bubba because Bubba had started it.
He said that he and Ross were trying to have a conversation and this guy was sitting with him.
Artie said that he hasn't missed out on regular meetings with Dr.
He figured that it must have been big over in Germany back before Hitler was taken out.
Keith said that he agrees that it could be a disaster.
Howard said he was thinking of calling it ''Assisted Pong'' or something like that but he liked Robin's ''Wack Pong.
Everyone agreed that it was the Real Doll.
Artie said that he's going to get JD some hot chick to bang him out there.
They spent a few minutes talking about him and some of the interviews he did over the years.
Robin told a story about how she had a guy tell her how nice her car was one time and then followed her home.
Gary said that they have the option to do something with Jeff to make some money.
'' He said that maybe they should say goodbye to each other officially.
Howard kept telling Gary to give Artie those tapes because he knows that Artie won't take them unless they force him to.
Howard thought it was kind of odd how he agreed to that so quickly.
James Special Ed And Jeff The Drunk Call In.
Keith said that Artie could be a great father and he really believes that he could do a good job at it.
Howard said they have some bugs to work out on the phone but you can watch video and listen to it as a regular iPod.
Richard said he wasn't that bad.
He said he's been thinking about doing a day or two once they leave.
Keith if Artie could be a father over the phone.
Howard had Jeff on the phone so he told Jeff he could push carts like Special Ed was.
Howard wondered why they'd have a dart board at a bar where people get drunk.
He said he thought that he'd tell everyone just in case Carmen is listening herself.
Brandon Is Willing To Do Anything To Sit In On The Show.
He gets his from work and doesn't keep them all.
They said he must have taken his hair style from Moe from the Three Stooges and his moustache from Charlie Chaplain.
He said that JD was just sitting there moping while everyone else was celebrating.
Howard said he's probably going to leave at the end of this contract at SIRIUS.
He said he should have had his buddy set him up with that chick JD was with.
Artie and Howard were coming up with more pong ideas.
The guys kept going, arguing back and forth about what went on.
Artie said that Richard's girlfriend is really good looking and he was talking to her about the trip they're going on where they're going to be staying in haunted houses and stuff.
He said that he likes some of the features it has but he's not sure he wants to get one.
They spent a few minutes talking about him and some of the interviews he did over the years.
He said he's lost weight, became Scores Man and things like that.
Brandon Is Willing To Do Anything To Sit In On The Show.
Howard said he's going to stick with Fred as being the one who has changed the most.
He said that the guy was really nice and picked up the tab but he wasn't looking for that.
He described the scene and how Jenna was on this Roman pillar thing and these guys are doing really bad accents.
Howard said he just did the math on that over the weekend and figured that he's marrying someone too old.
He said he thought that he'd tell everyone just in case Carmen is listening herself.
He said that he'd love to be able to check out his web site from wherever he's at.
The guy who played the original Cousin It was there and got upset about him not coming.
Ralph said maybe he can read into things the wrong way but this last thing is what drove him over the edge.
Artie Gives Out His Phone Number.
Howard told Bubba about what went on with Ralph and how he seems to be ''over the Bubba thing.
Howard said he was thinking of calling it ''Assisted Pong'' or something like that but he liked Robin's ''Wack Pong.
Howard told Artie that he has to be able to plan his own day instead of relying on someone else.
Howard had Robin start her news right after that.
Richard said the dart board was in a really high traffic area too and people had to duck under it when people were throwing darts.
He's going to be stuck in bed for the next two weeks.
Artie said that he hasn't missed out on regular meetings with Dr.
Howard said he didn't need to go there.
JD said he didn't think that any of the chicks that were there were all that attractive.
Gary said that he thinks that the puppet may have been stolen over there at K-Rock and may not have made it over there from there.
Keith Ablow so he had a surprise for him this morning.
James even did a ''Yay!
Howard read through some of The Onion's latest headlines which are pretty funny.
He said that he and Gary were talking about Fred and how much he's changed over the years.
They could do that and work as little as possible.
Howard said guys who save their porno and catalog them are really creepy.
He said he thought that he'd tell everyone just in case Carmen is listening herself.
'' Artie said that he's had that movie for at least a dozen years.
She never thought that would happen but it did.
He said he's sure it will get better as the years go on.
He said that came off as her being a phony.
Artie asked who she is.
Robin said she can't see it being a comfortable thing for Artie or the woman.
Jeff said if anyone wants to send stuff, they can send it to Albany Med  and his name is Jeff Curro.
He had to get Ralph back because Howard had just hung up on him thinking they weren't going to get him.
He said this guy had been begging him to come down there and then he pulls this stuff.
Artie Gives Out His Phone Number.
Howard read through some of The Onion's latest headlines which are pretty funny.
He said that one of the guys there has one and he was saying that his phone gets shut down whenever he gets an e-mail.
Richard said that moustache would have to be on the nicest person in the world to bring it back into style.
Howard said he does say hi to some fans and will shake a hand here or there but some of this stuff can get annoying.
Artie said that Richard's girlfriend is really good looking and he was talking to her about the trip they're going on where they're going to be staying in haunted houses and stuff.
He said they can do that all day Friday and all day Saturday.
He said he loved the food and he's eaten there before but it's retarded to do stuff like that.
Howard said that Artie blowing off sessions is wrong and he really should try to make these things happen.
He said he speaks 'retard'' so that's how he understood.
Howard told Jeff to take care of himself.
Howard said that this guy's name is Luis so he wanted to get that out of the way.
Richard Christy came in a short time later and told the guys about how he has a storage place there in the city and he's got boxes full of Playboys in there.
He said they can do that all day Friday and all day Saturday.
Ralph said he thinks he's done with Bubba at this point.
Howard said he was thinking of calling it ''Assisted Pong'' or something like that but he liked Robin's ''Wack Pong.
Fred said that he would put Jackie in that discussion because his life really got changed when he was on the show.
He said that he never got laid in the past either.
That caught his attention because it doesn't seem that way.
Bubba didn't like hearing that but Ralph was agreeing with him.
She said that the woman could get sick of dealing with Artie and move on with some other guy who will take over as the kid's father.
He made up some conversations he might have on the phone with these random calls he'd make.
He figured he'd just do it while he was sitting at his desk instead of waiting for his TV screen to drop down and all of that.
Ralph called in a short time later and said that it seems a little irresponsible for her to have gone on Larry King after just being on this diet for a few weeks.
Howard asked JD if he's paid for any whores yet.
'' Howard got back to his jerking off story and told the guys he was in his chair naked and beating off to the Carmen Luvana movie.
Ralph said that is why and he's kind of soured over Bubba right now.
He said that he'd love to be able to check out his web site from wherever he's at.
He said he realized that he does have a type like the guys on the show say, she's a bartender at a club in Jersey.
Artie asked who she is.
Keith said that Artie started off his first meeting saying that he had a pretty care free life.
He said he's sure it will get better as the years go on.
Howard said he did that but he was just being nice.
Gary said that he thinks that the puppet may have been stolen over there at K-Rock and may not have made it over there from there.
Brandon Is Willing To Do Anything To Sit In On The Show.
Bubba didn't like hearing that but Ralph was agreeing with him.
He said he hates using that term but he had nothing better to describe how much he wanted it turned up.
Howard said Beth was out last night so he figured he'd run off a batch to make himself tired.
He said that JD was just sitting there moping while everyone else was celebrating.
Richard said the dart board was in a really high traffic area too and people had to duck under it when people were throwing darts.
Ralph said he wasn't even mad at Bubba, he was just upset about Heather but Bubba brought it there.
Artie said that it was just the one time though.
Howard asked Roni if Robin has been able to maintain her weight without her.
Howard said that this guy's name is Luis so he wanted to get that out of the way.
Howard asked what's worse, waxing her pussy or giving her a breast exam.
He said it'll probably take him a year to get through that movie at the rate he goes through them.
He said he ate most of it after she ate like one bite of the pancakes and one of the fries.
Howard said that this guy's name is Luis so he wanted to get that out of the way.
Howard said that when you say ''creepy lawyer, that's being kind of redundant.
Gary came in and said that he thought they had it and figured that they were supposed to have brought it over from K-Rock.
Keith said that he agrees that it could be a disaster.
Howard said he could also just call random people on the phone and talk to them to vent.
He said that he wants to open a bar where they have a firing range.
The guy who played the original Cousin It was there and got upset about him not coming.
He said that he seems to remember that she was pretty hairy down there back when he was younger.
Robin mentioned JD and Howard still stuck with Fred.
Howard asked if they could call him ''Special Ed'' since he was in Special Ed.
Gary told him that's very easy to do, you just hook it up to whatever computer you have your iTunes on.
He figured he'd just do it while he was sitting at his desk instead of waiting for his TV screen to drop down and all of that.
JD told Howard that he doesn't talk to anyone he doesn't know so that's why he doesn't meet new chicks.
He had to get Ralph back because Howard had just hung up on him thinking they weren't going to get him.
The guys were curious about if that was where Hitler stole it from or if Chaplain stole it from Hitler.
Artie asked him how much longer he's going to be in there.
Keith if Artie could be a father over the phone.
Brandon said that it is pretty much anything but Robin asked him if he'd have gay sex and he said probably not.
Bubba said that he can do that because it's his wife.
Roni talked about the things Robin is eating and drinking now.
He said that his future wife might be jumping around in the bouncy castle at Ronnie's block party.
Howard To Bring Back The Hitler Moustache?
He said he's lost weight, became Scores Man and things like that.
He read that Imus is looking to get back on the air but he can't imagine why the guy would want to keep working at that age.
Howard asked what's worse, waxing her pussy or giving her a breast exam.
He said that he didn't get laid the first night so he wants to go on a second date.
Howard wondered if Brandon's mother is really hairy down there.
Fred said that he would put Jackie in that discussion because his life really got changed when he was on the show.
Richard said that moustache would have to be on the nicest person in the world to bring it back into style.
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He said that JD doesn't invite anyone to talk to him and no chick is going to go up to him and start a conversation.
Howard asked JD if he's paid for any whores yet.
Howard said that when you say ''creepy lawyer, that's being kind of redundant.
Howard helped him and told him to drop the zeros and he could get it easy.
He said he should have had his buddy set him up with that chick JD was with.
He let him go a short time later and moved on to other stuff.
Roni thanked Howard very much because they're getting thousands of e-mails and calls from the fans who need help losing weight.
He refused to do that but then the guy had his face really close and he was kind of drunk.
Howard said he could see doing that.
JD told Howard that he doesn't talk to anyone he doesn't know so that's why he doesn't meet new chicks.
Howard wondered if he would have been as successful without that moustache.
JD told Howard that he doesn't talk to anyone he doesn't know so that's why he doesn't meet new chicks.
That caught his attention because it doesn't seem that way.
He's cut people out of his life, like his father, and he has no problem cutting Bubba out.
The article also mentioned that they have a cruise coming up next year so maybe Majors will be able to make that.
Roni for coming in and said that Robin seems to be doing very well on the maintenance program.
He's on bed rest now and he's not able to smoke.
Howard told him that Fred is also mentally challenged so there's nothing wrong with that.
Artie asked Gary if he could move all of his music from his iPod to this new iPhone.
Howard said he wondered if he should grow out that Hitler moustache and show up on Letterman to tell him he's growing it to try and bring it back into style.
Howard said he's probably going to leave at the end of this contract at SIRIUS.
He said that JD was just sitting there moping while everyone else was celebrating.
He said he speaks 'retard'' so that's how he understood.
Robin mentioned JD and Howard still stuck with Fred.
Howard said it's crazy out there.
Keith said that Artie has a huge heart and he thinks that if Artie never experiences fatherhood, he's going to miss out on a lot.
He figured he'd just do it while he was sitting at his desk instead of waiting for his TV screen to drop down and all of that.
He said he was really happy to have met him and gave the chick a hug.
Snores Through The News.
Artie mentioned that he got one of these new iPhone things.
He said he was really happy to have met him and gave the chick a hug.
He said he wanted to get that over with so the guy came over and pulled out his Beer League and It's the Whisky Talkin DVDs to get signed.
Howard finally put an end to it and had Robin get to her news.
the guys also brought up the Osama bin Laden beard and how he may have stolen that from the ZZ Top guys.
Ralph said maybe he can read into things the wrong way but this last thing is what drove him over the edge.
Keith said that he agrees that it could be a disaster.
Fred told Howard that he was reading that Hitler had to shave his moustache to fit his gas mask that he had to wear back in those days so that's the only reason he shaved it to look like that.
Howard wondered if Richard and Sal would be up for some ''Dong Pong'' where they hit the balls with their penises.
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Howard wondered just what ''anything'' is.
He's going to be stuck in bed for the next two weeks.
Howard wondered if he would have been as successful without that moustache.
He's got a whole floor of rooms out there at the hotel he's staying at and if he has to, he's going to pay for some chicks.
He said that his future wife might be jumping around in the bouncy castle at Ronnie's block party.
Fred said that he would put Jackie in that discussion because his life really got changed when he was on the show.
He said that JD was just sitting there moping while everyone else was celebrating.
He said he loved the food and he's eaten there before but it's retarded to do stuff like that.
Howard said she was on the show and he was going through his stash of porno and found that one to watch.
Artie said that he was supposed to chat with Keith on the day he was doing Conan.
He said he slept through the appointment he had and just didn't have the time to do it.
He explained how bad the movie was and how this other chick comes and tries to pick her up.
Howard said that Tom is a good actor and people tend to forget that based on his wacky behavior.
Howard said that they should have been there to do interviews, he would have loved to have spoken to the guy who played Cousin It.
He told him to tell Gary to turn up the temperature a cunt hair.
Howard asked the guy about going to school and how he was left back while all of the other kids moved on.
He said he'd have to check with her on that but he thinks she might do it.
He said Bubba has been kind of rude to him about a few things and disrespected him so he's glad he's done with that.
Howard told Artie that he has to be able to plan his own day instead of relying on someone else.
Howard helped him and told him to drop the zeros and he could get it easy.
Everyone agreed that it was the Real Doll.
Howard wondered what's creepier.
Ralph talked about how shitty it was for Heather to have sent him a nice thank-you note for the gift he gave but then she talks about how crappy the gift was on the air.
He said this guy had been begging him to come down there and then he pulls this stuff.
He said he actually works for Wal-Mart right now and pushes carts for them.
Keith said that Artie has a huge heart and he thinks that if Artie never experiences fatherhood, he's going to miss out on a lot.
He said he loved the food and he's eaten there before but it's retarded to do stuff like that.
A guy who has a Real Doll or one who saves his porno.
That caught his attention because it doesn't seem that way.
The guys talked about Hitler and some history about him.
A guy who has a Real Doll or one who saves his porno.
Howard said that's funny that Lee Majors is a big draw like that.
He said that some of the movies that Gary has in his office are really bizarre looking and they should be thrown out.
Howard wondered what's creepier.
Artie said that the phone was a great gift and he really wants to figure it out.
Keith said that Artie has a huge heart and he thinks that if Artie never experiences fatherhood, he's going to miss out on a lot.
Robin said she can't see it being a comfortable thing for Artie or the woman.
He told him to tell Gary to turn up the temperature a cunt hair.
Artie Gives Out His Phone Number.
He told Artie that he should take over his own life and start doing stuff himself instead of having this guy Teddy as his assistant.
Howard helped him and told him to drop the zeros and he could get it easy.
He said he thought that he'd tell everyone just in case Carmen is listening herself.
Howard said that they should have been there to do interviews, he would have loved to have spoken to the guy who played Cousin It.
He described the scene and how Jenna was on this Roman pillar thing and these guys are doing really bad accents.
'' that sounded very similar to Jim's retarded character.
Artie thinks that Johnny Depp could pull it off too.
'' Howard thanked Dr.
Gary said that they have the option to do something with Jeff to make some money.
He said that came off as her being a phony.
He said that he's not sure how they're going to do it now.
Howard told Jeff to take care of himself.
He was in the middle of it when he thought about watching more of it even after he finished.
Artie said that he went out on a date with a chick on Saturday and had to beat off after because he didn't get laid.
Howard had Jeff on the phone so he told Jeff he could push carts like Special Ed was.
She never thought that would happen but it did.
He said it takes a lot of balls to walk around with a moustache like that.
He said he wanted to get that over with so the guy came over and pulled out his Beer League and It's the Whisky Talkin DVDs to get signed.
Fred said that Howard may have just released the ''inner Ronnie.
He said it was a really weird move to make but he doesn't really care because he's not expecting a long term relationship.
He mentioned the Darth Nihilus guy and the Gamorrean guard doing impressions of them.
Artie Wrap Up Show Clips.
He said Richard was out shooting pool and getting really drunk.
Richard said the dart board was in a really high traffic area too and people had to duck under it when people were throwing darts.
Howard did an interview with him one time and said he kind of mixed it up with him on his show one time.
Artie mentioned that he got one of these new iPhone things.
That caught his attention because it doesn't seem that way.
He said he thinks that Ralph started the whole thing when he told her to change her shoes.
Roni for coming in and said that Robin seems to be doing very well on the maintenance program.
He said that Majors burned all of his fans by not showing up.
He said it turns out the guy works with her and he anted to meet him.
He said that he didn't get laid the first night so he wants to go on a second date.
She said that what she's recommending to people won't kill them unless they abuse it.
Howard said it's crazy out there.
They don't want to play darts like that.
Artie said that Tom Cruise is making a new movie about the Nazis and he saw him in one of those uniforms and he really fit the part.
Howard had Jeff on the phone so he told Jeff he could push carts like Special Ed was.
Artie said that they're going to be at this club out there and the chicks are going to be unreal.
Keith said he wanted to explain that to everyone so they understand.
Howard told Bubba about what went on with Ralph and how he seems to be ''over the Bubba thing.
He said that the guy was telling his life story to him and he kind of didn't give a shit.
Brandon agreed to it immediately.
He said that Majors burned all of his fans by not showing up.
Robin wondered why he was talking like that.
He figured that it must have been big over in Germany back before Hitler was taken out.
She said that the woman could get sick of dealing with Artie and move on with some other guy who will take over as the kid's father.
Keith said that he agrees that it could be a disaster.
Howard asked Special Ed if he could do simple math.
He figured that it must have been big over in Germany back before Hitler was taken out.
That caught his attention because it doesn't seem that way.
Ralph didn't seem worried about that.
He said that some of the movies that Gary has in his office are really bizarre looking and they should be thrown out.
Artie said he can see Howard blogging in his future instead of doing a radio show.
Brandon agreed to it immediately.
He said he kept the conversation going and kept his face way too close.
Howard read through some of The Onion's latest headlines which are pretty funny.
Fred said that he would put Jackie in that discussion because his life really got changed when he was on the show.
Gary said that you can't say something like that to a guy about his wife and not expect him to get pissed.
Ralph said that is why and he's kind of soured over Bubba right now.
Artie said he can see Howard blogging in his future instead of doing a radio show.
Howard said guys who save their porno and catalog them are really creepy.
Brandon said that it is pretty much anything but Robin asked him if he'd have gay sex and he said probably not.
He said that it's edited really poorly and they cut to other scenes.
He was about to hang up but Jeff asked for people to send him magazines and stuff.
Jackie Puppet Still Missing.
He said that he's not sure how they're going to do it now.
Howard said Beth was out last night so he figured he'd run off a batch to make himself tired.
He said he hated the Blackberry because the phone sucked so bad.
He sent them a letter and claimed that he'd be willing to do anything to get in there.
He said it was a really weird move to make but he doesn't really care because he's not expecting a long term relationship.
That led to them talking about Charles Manson.
Robin said it may have all gone hand in hand.
He said they're going to hang out at the pool all day Friday and there will be chicks all over the place.
He said it was a really weird move to make but he doesn't really care because he's not expecting a long term relationship.
JD said he doesn't think he has.
Howard said that John Stamos could pull it off and get laid with that moustache.
He read that Imus is looking to get back on the air but he can't imagine why the guy would want to keep working at that age.
Howard called JD in there to get him in this conversation.
Bionic-Con Discussions.
He said that some of the movies that Gary has in his office are really bizarre looking and they should be thrown out.
He said this guy had been begging him to come down there and then he pulls this stuff.
Snores Through The News.
Ralph said he thinks he's done with Bubba at this point.
He was about to hang up but Jeff asked for people to send him magazines and stuff.
Artie said he knows the porno movies he has as well as he knows the Godfather movie.
Artie said that he's going to get JD some hot chick to bang him out there.
After that Howard came back and asked JD to tell Gary that it was too cold in there.
He described the scene and how Jenna was on this Roman pillar thing and these guys are doing really bad accents.
He said Bubba has been kind of rude to him about a few things and disrespected him so he's glad he's done with that.
Ralph talked about how shitty it was for Heather to have sent him a nice thank-you note for the gift he gave but then she talks about how crappy the gift was on the air.
He mentioned the Darth Nihilus guy and the Gamorrean guard doing impressions of them.
Keith said that he agrees that it could be a disaster.
The guys said that's all gay though.
Howard said he tried to get Bubba and Ralph back tother this weekend but that didn't happen.
He said he didn't call Gary over the weekend to yell at him.
Howard talked about how he was using a Blackberry for a while but now he's using a Treo.
The caller was telling Howard about his life and Howard asked him if he's learning disabled.
Keith's Emergency Session With Artie.
She said that what she's recommending to people won't kill them unless they abuse it.
He said that Mancow guy really sucks now.
'' Artie suggested ''Handi-Pong'' which might work too.
Richard said he likes those guys who grow really long moustaches and curl them at the ends.
He said he didn't call Gary over the weekend to yell at him.
Howard had Robin start her news right after that.
Fred said that he would put Jackie in that discussion because his life really got changed when he was on the show.
Then, in the middle of his orgasm, he realized how disgusting it is and how disgusted he was with himself.
Everyone agreed with that.
He said that he's not sure how they're going to do it now.
Howard also spent some time talking about Don Imus after reading in the paper that he may be close to a settlement with CBS.
He said he saw Richard playing darts when he was leaving the bar the guys were at.
Keith said he wanted to explain that to everyone so they understand.
She said that they found he had a bunch of porn videos in his house.
Gary said they were talking about whose life has changed the least and Scott the Engineer's name came up.
Howard said he feels that his creepy factor is down compared to some guys.
He said that his future wife might be jumping around in the bouncy castle at Ronnie's block party.
He let him go a short time later and moved on to other stuff.
Howard said that Ronnie is another one who was changed by the show.
He said that if he'll do that, then he's in for the news.
He said that Majors burned all of his fans by not showing up.
Robin noticed that he has very big hands and pointed that out to the guys.
He had to get Ralph back because Howard had just hung up on him thinking they weren't going to get him.
Howard said it turns out Lee Majors had to film a movie that weekend and wasn't able to make it.
Howard said that's a good question because everyone has changed.
Fred said that Howard may have just released the ''inner Ronnie.
He described the scene and how Jenna was on this Roman pillar thing and these guys are doing really bad accents.
Robin said that she was reading about this creepy lawyer guy  who had set up this peep hole camera to check out some female public defenders he worked with.
Ralph said maybe he can read into things the wrong way but this last thing is what drove him over the edge.
Brandon Is Willing To Do Anything To Sit In On The Show.
Howard said that when you say ''creepy lawyer, that's being kind of redundant.
JD said he didn't think that any of the chicks that were there were all that attractive.
'' Howard called it the ''inner asshole'' but Fred wasn't going to go down that road with him.
Jeff said that you have to collect a whole bunch of carts doing that job and he really can't do that with one arm.
Howard said he did that but he was just being nice.
Jeff said that they had to do his skin graft over again because it didn't take the first time.
He said he's lost weight, became Scores Man and things like that.
Howard wondered just what ''anything'' is.
Howard wondered what's creepier.
He said that the guy was telling his life story to him and he kind of didn't give a shit.
Artie said that he was sitting there at the diner and this guy in a dirty hat and shirt was staring at him.
He figured he'd just do it while he was sitting at his desk instead of waiting for his TV screen to drop down and all of that.
Howard started off the show talking about how he beat off to Carmen Luvana last night.
Richard Christy came in a short time later and told the guys about how he has a storage place there in the city and he's got boxes full of Playboys in there.
Artie talked about some of the movies he has and how he can recite the lines from them.
Richard said he wasn't that bad.
He said that's how hot the chicks were.
He was in the middle of it when he thought about watching more of it even after he finished.
Artie said that a bunch of the guys from SIRIUS were there at the bar where the guys were celebrating.
Artie got back to his story about his date.
Richard said he wasn't that bad.
He said they can do that all day Friday and all day Saturday.
Robin wondered why he was talking like that.
Artie said he knows the porno movies he has as well as he knows the Godfather movie.
Artie asked who she is.
Howard called JD in there to get him in this conversation.
He didn't have anything negative to say about the guy.
He had to get Ralph back because Howard had just hung up on him thinking they weren't going to get him.
He said that it's edited really poorly and they cut to other scenes.
After that Howard came back and asked JD to tell Gary that it was too cold in there.
He said Richard was out shooting pool and getting really drunk.
Artie Gives Out His Phone Number.
JD said he doesn't think he has.
Ralph said that is why and he's kind of soured over Bubba right now.
Keith said that Artie has a huge heart and he thinks that if Artie never experiences fatherhood, he's going to miss out on a lot.
He said he was really happy to have met him and gave the chick a hug.
Howard said he did that but he was just being nice.
Artie said he'll probably call the chick today.
A guy who has a Real Doll or one who saves his porno.
He said he's sure he could get laid like that but Robin said that would mess up his look.
He's got a whole floor of rooms out there at the hotel he's staying at and if he has to, he's going to pay for some chicks.
Artie said that it was just the one time though.
He was in the middle of it when he thought about watching more of it even after he finished.
Bong Hit was doing his Jackie Puppet impression but Howard had to move on to some other stuff so he let him go.
She said that the woman could get sick of dealing with Artie and move on with some other guy who will take over as the kid's father.
Howard said he didn't need to go there.
The guys said that's all gay though.
He said it takes a lot of balls to walk around with a moustache like that.
Artie got back to his story about his date.
They talked about Charlie Chaplain and how he had that kind of moustache.
He said that didn't last too long so they moved on and by the time the girls got up on stage in this strip club, he was done jerking off.
Robin said that she was reading about this creepy lawyer guy  who had set up this peep hole camera to check out some female public defenders he worked with.
He said the guy is all old and tired.
He made up some conversations he might have on the phone with these random calls he'd make.
She never thought that would happen but it did.
He sent them a letter and claimed that he'd be willing to do anything to get in there.
Howard wondered why they'd have a dart board at a bar where people get drunk.
Artie said that the waxing has to be worse.
Howard said that they'll have the waxing woman there and she'll show Brandon what to do.
Artie said that Tom Cruise is making a new movie about the Nazis and he saw him in one of those uniforms and he really fit the part.
Artie said that they're going to be at this club out there and the chicks are going to be unreal.
The guys said that Special Ed had a harder job than even Jeff the Drunk ever did.
Bionic-Con Discussions.
Ralph said maybe he can read into things the wrong way but this last thing is what drove him over the edge.
Keith said that he just can't see Artie having a wife and kid like he wants to.
Roni come in and say a few words to him.
Bong Hit was doing his Jackie Puppet impression but Howard had to move on to some other stuff so he let him go.
He said that he'd love to be able to check out his web site from wherever he's at.
Special Ed asked for his autograph so Howard put him on hold and told Gary to sign something for him.
Brandon Is Willing To Do Anything To Sit In On The Show.
Howard said that it's probably better that way.
He said that his future wife might be jumping around in the bouncy castle at Ronnie's block party.
He gets his from work and doesn't keep them all.
Artie said that they're going to be at this club out there and the chicks are going to be unreal.
Howard asked JD if he's ever beat off to Carmen Luvana.
Artie talked about some of the movies he has and how he can recite the lines from them.
Howard said that this guy's name is Luis so he wanted to get that out of the way.
He saw a guy out the other night like that and figured he was really old school.
He said that's how hot the chicks were.
'' Howard thanked Dr.
He said this is a great place to work and he still thinks that satellite radio is going to be huge.
JD said he doesn't think he has.
Howard made fun of him by comparing him to the Star Wars guys they've interviewed recently.
Robin said it may have all gone hand in hand.
The caller was telling Howard about his life and Howard asked him if he's learning disabled.
He saw a guy out the other night like that and figured he was really old school.
He said he was really happy to have met him and gave the chick a hug.
Howard said there was this other guy there who wanted to shake his hand when he was eating.
Howard had Jeff on the phone so he told Jeff he could push carts like Special Ed was.
The caller asked Howard when they're going to have Valentina Vaughn back on the show.
Jeff said that you have to collect a whole bunch of carts doing that job and he really can't do that with one arm.
Howard said that Fred rarely travels or invites anyone over.
Roni thanked Howard very much because they're getting thousands of e-mails and calls from the fans who need help losing weight.
Robin said she can't see it being a comfortable thing for Artie or the woman.
He said they can do that all day Friday and all day Saturday.
Howard talked about how he was using a Blackberry for a while but now he's using a Treo.
Jeff said that he hasn't smoked a cigarette since Tuesday.
Howard read that some fans were really upset that Majors didn't show up.
Artie asked Gary if he could move all of his music from his iPod to this new iPhone.
Howard said they were going to tape ping pong paddles on his arm and play Wack Pong.
Howard said they have some bugs to work out on the phone but you can watch video and listen to it as a regular iPod.
Howard said that's funny that Lee Majors is a big draw like that.
Artie said he can see Howard blogging in his future instead of doing a radio show.
Robin noticed that he has very big hands and pointed that out to the guys.
Howard wondered why they'd have a dart board at a bar where people get drunk.
Howard figures they'll come back on Monday and hear how JD just sat there doing nothing.
The guys kept going, arguing back and forth about what went on.
He said that he was having a bad day anyway and just slept through it.
The guys kept going, arguing back and forth about what went on.
He said that he never got laid in the past either.
Artie said he knows the porno movies he has as well as he knows the Godfather movie.
He said that Majors burned all of his fans by not showing up.
Artie said that they're going to be at this club out there and the chicks are going to be unreal.
Howard said he just did the math on that over the weekend and figured that he's marrying someone too old.
He said he didn't call Gary over the weekend to yell at him.
Artie got back to his story about his date.
A guy who has a Real Doll or one who saves his porno.
Howard let her come in even though he was trying to get out of there.
Howard To Bring Back The Hitler Moustache?
Howard had some stuff to say about that phone but he had to take a break first.
He went on to say that the movie is called ''Panty Drawer''  and all of the chicks in the movie are hot.
He said they're going to hang out at the pool all day Friday and there will be chicks all over the place.
Bubba said he's been nice to him every time he's seen him.
He said that he wants to open a bar where they have a firing range.
He said he thought that he'd tell everyone just in case Carmen is listening herself.
Howard said he could hear Dave asking him about his moustache and he'd have to tell him that he'd like it to be called the Howard moustache instead of a Hitler moustache.
Artie mentioned that he got one of these new iPhone things.
Artie mentioned that he got one of these new iPhone things.
Artie talked about some of the movies he has and how he can recite the lines from them.
Artie said he went home that day and took a nap and wasn't able to call him that day.
Howard told him he could come in if he brought his mother in and waxed her.
Keith Ablow so he had a surprise for him this morning.
'' Howard thanked Dr.
Jackie Puppet Still Missing.
Howard said that Fred rarely travels or invites anyone over.
He said that maybe she should have waited to see how the diet worked out long term.
He said he ate most of it after she ate like one bite of the pancakes and one of the fries.
Howard said he could see doing that.
Jon Hein got back to his Wrap Up Show preview and said they'd be talking about Charlie Murphy's visit as well.
He didn't have anything negative to say about the guy.
She was ready to run into her house to call the cops.
Keith's Emergency Session With Artie.
Howard said he did that but he was just being nice.
They talked about Charlie Chaplain and how he had that kind of moustache.
He said that he seems to remember that she was pretty hairy down there back when he was younger.
Ralph didn't seem worried about that.
Artie asked who she is.
He said that he wants to open a bar where they have a firing range.
He said that he and Gary were talking about Fred and how much he's changed over the years.
Howard wondered if Brandon's mother is really hairy down there.
Roni talked about the things Robin is eating and drinking now.
Ralph didn't seem worried about that.
Bubba didn't like hearing that but Ralph was agreeing with him.
Artie asked who she is.
Gary said that a lot of people had a key to that studio over there and anyone could get in there.
He said that the people at Rescue Me sent him one as a gift and he thinks it looks really cool.
Howard said he's going to stick with Fred as being the one who has changed the most.
He figured that it must have been big over in Germany back before Hitler was taken out.
He's going to be stuck in bed for the next two weeks.
'' Howard thanked Dr.
He said he ate most of it after she ate like one bite of the pancakes and one of the fries.
Bubba said he's been nice to him every time he's seen him.
He said they can do that all day Friday and all day Saturday.
She said that the woman could get sick of dealing with Artie and move on with some other guy who will take over as the kid's father.
Robin noticed that he has very big hands and pointed that out to the guys.
Artie said he knows the porno movies he has as well as he knows the Godfather movie.
He said he was just talking to people he knew.
Artie said that the waxing has to be worse.
Howard said it's crazy out there.
Artie said that a bunch of the guys from SIRIUS were there at the bar where the guys were celebrating.
He said he slept through the appointment he had and just didn't have the time to do it.
Howard brought up this iPhone thing that Artie mentioned earlier.
Ralph talked about how shitty it was for Heather to have sent him a nice thank-you note for the gift he gave but then she talks about how crappy the gift was on the air.
Richard Christy came in a short time later and told the guys about how he has a storage place there in the city and he's got boxes full of Playboys in there.
Howard asked the guy about going to school and how he was left back while all of the other kids moved on.
He didn't get laid but he did some kissing when he dropped her off at home, which is her parent's house.
Howard said that's funny that Lee Majors is a big draw like that.
'' Howard got back to his jerking off story and told the guys he was in his chair naked and beating off to the Carmen Luvana movie.
Howard read through some of The Onion's latest headlines which are pretty funny.
Then, in the middle of his orgasm, he realized how disgusting it is and how disgusted he was with himself.
He read through the article and said that there were stars like Richard Anderson, Erin Gray and Gil Gerard.
He said they're going to hang out at the pool all day Friday and there will be chicks all over the place.
Keith said that Artie has a huge heart and he thinks that if Artie never experiences fatherhood, he's going to miss out on a lot.
He said that he might have done her the next day if he had the chance.
He's got one that Jenna Jameson is in and how the guys in the movie are all doing really bad accents in it.
The article also mentioned that they have a cruise coming up next year so maybe Majors will be able to make that.
Keith said it had been more than that.
Artie got back to his story about his date.
Brandon said he thinks that she'll be okay with it.
He made up some conversations he might have on the phone with these random calls he'd make.
Howard took a call from a guy who said that Bubba can't bring his wife on the show and not expect her to get some shit.
He said that he seems to remember that she was pretty hairy down there back when he was younger.
He said that he didn't get laid the first night so he wants to go on a second date.
Brandon said he thinks that she'll be okay with it.
He said he saw Richard playing darts when he was leaving the bar the guys were at.
He figured that it must have been big over in Germany back before Hitler was taken out.
Gary said he'd take care of it.
Howard said guys who save their porno and catalog them are really creepy.
He said he's sure he could get laid like that but Robin said that would mess up his look.
Jon Hein got back to his Wrap Up Show preview and said they'd be talking about Charlie Murphy's visit as well.
Howard said it's crazy out there.
Howard read through some of The Onion's latest headlines which are pretty funny.
He said he loved the food and he's eaten there before but it's retarded to do stuff like that.
He said that there were chicks there.
He said that if he'll do that, then he's in for the news.
Jon Hein got back to his Wrap Up Show preview and said they'd be talking about Charlie Murphy's visit as well.
Howard said she probably just wanted a plug.
After that Howard came back and asked JD to tell Gary that it was too cold in there.
He said he slept through the appointment he had and just didn't have the time to do it.
Dominic Barbara called in and said he thinks that Bubba is going to kick his ass when he sees him.
Then Jenna hooks up with a guy and starts doing the guy.
Howard asked JD if he's paid for any whores yet.
Howard said he does say hi to some fans and will shake a hand here or there but some of this stuff can get annoying.
Jeff said that they had to do his skin graft over again because it didn't take the first time.
Richard got back to the dart board thing and said that they do make plastic ones that stick in a board that has holes in it.
Artie asked him how much longer he's going to be in there.
Howard thanked Special Ed for calling in and let him go.
Howard said she was on the show and he was going through his stash of porno and found that one to watch.
Artie said that a bunch of the guys from SIRIUS were there at the bar where the guys were celebrating.
Ralph called in and said that he saw one of these Dateline shows where they catch child predators and one guy showed up with a tube of K-Y in his pocket.
Ralph said he may have overreacted that morning.
Jeff said that he hasn't smoked a cigarette since Tuesday.
Gary came in and said that he thought they had it and figured that they were supposed to have brought it over from K-Rock.
Fred said that he would put Jackie in that discussion because his life really got changed when he was on the show.
Robin said that JD was on his way to dying a virgin.
He said that the guy was telling his life story to him and he kind of didn't give a shit.
He said that he and Ross were trying to have a conversation and this guy was sitting with him.
Artie asked who she is.
The guys were curious about if that was where Hitler stole it from or if Chaplain stole it from Hitler.
Howard said that he's really steamed about that puppet because no one knows where it is.
Keith said that Artie has a huge heart and he thinks that if Artie never experiences fatherhood, he's going to miss out on a lot.
Howard said guys who save their porno and catalog them are really creepy.
Gary came in and said that he thought they had it and figured that they were supposed to have brought it over from K-Rock.
Artie asked who she is.
Then at the end of the conversation the owner asked him to talk to his partner who was in the hospital.
Howard had some stuff to say about that phone but he had to take a break first.
Keith said that Artie has a huge heart and he thinks that if Artie never experiences fatherhood, he's going to miss out on a lot.
Howard said he did that but he was just being nice.
Howard kept telling Gary to give Artie those tapes because he knows that Artie won't take them unless they force him to.
Artie said he knows the porno movies he has as well as he knows the Godfather movie.
Howard went on to talk about this Bionic-Con convention and how it featured fans of the Six Million Dollar Man.
Howard brought up this iPhone thing that Artie mentioned earlier.
Howard had Jeff on the phone so he told Jeff he could push carts like Special Ed was.
He said he's lost weight, became Scores Man and things like that.
He said he keeps them for a long time and doesn't get rid of them.
He said that he seems to remember that she was pretty hairy down there back when he was younger.
He said he thinks the movie was called ''Maiden Sarah.
Special Ed asked for his autograph so Howard put him on hold and told Gary to sign something for him.
The guys said that's all gay though.
He said that all hot bartender chicks wear them.
Jackie Puppet Still Missing.
Keith if Artie could be a father over the phone.
Artie said that he told this chick he was going on the date with to meet him at this diner they agreed on.
Robin said that the things she's talking about are natural remedies and not poison pills like some doctors are prescribing to people.
She said that they found he had a bunch of porn videos in his house.
That led to them talking about Charles Manson.
He said he thinks that Ralph started the whole thing when he told her to change her shoes.
He said he hates using that term but he had nothing better to describe how much he wanted it turned up.
the guys also brought up the Osama bin Laden beard and how he may have stolen that from the ZZ Top guys.
He said he hated the Blackberry because the phone sucked so bad.
Robin said she can't see it being a comfortable thing for Artie or the woman.
Jackie Puppet Still Missing.
Lew, Upset Over Interview.
Artie and Howard were coming up with more pong ideas.
Jeff said that he hasn't smoked a cigarette since Tuesday.
Keith if Artie could be a father over the phone.
Howard made fun of him by comparing him to the Star Wars guys they've interviewed recently.
Howard did an interview with him one time and said he kind of mixed it up with him on his show one time.
He said that a guy who keeps every Playboy in plastic is really weird.
Artie said that he was sitting there at the diner and this guy in a dirty hat and shirt was staring at him.
Howard said as long as he had Ralph on the phone he wanted to talk to him about what he said to Bubba's wife.
Artie Gives Out His Phone Number.
Howard said he feels that his creepy factor is down compared to some guys.
Artie said that he told this chick he was going on the date with to meet him at this diner they agreed on.
He said he wanted to get that over with so the guy came over and pulled out his Beer League and It's the Whisky Talkin DVDs to get signed.
Ralph said he was just agreeing with Bubba because Bubba had started it.
He said that there were chicks there.
Howard said he once asked Mark Chernoff to grow a Hitler moustache back when he was on K-Rock.
JD said he doesn't think he has.
He said that his future wife might be jumping around in the bouncy castle at Ronnie's block party.
She never thought that would happen but it did.
He's on bed rest now and he's not able to smoke.
Brandon said that it is pretty much anything but Robin asked him if he'd have gay sex and he said probably not.
The guy who played the original Cousin It was there and got upset about him not coming.
He said that all hot bartender chicks wear them.
Artie said he knows the porno movies he has as well as he knows the Godfather movie.
Roni thanked Howard very much because they're getting thousands of e-mails and calls from the fans who need help losing weight.
Howard said that Carmen Luvana has been on the show a couple of times and Benjy once had his toe inside of her.
He said he's sure he could get laid like that but Robin said that would mess up his look.
Richard said he wasn't that bad.
Robin mentioned JD and Howard still stuck with Fred.
Bubba said he's been nice to him every time he's seen him.
Howard said he could see doing that.
Howard said that they'll have the waxing woman there and she'll show Brandon what to do.
Everyone agreed with that.
He said it'll be two weeks so Artie said he might have to go up there and bother him.
He said that she was wearing these skin tight bartender pants and they were really hot to him.
Howard thought it was kind of odd how he agreed to that so quickly.
Ralph said he may have overreacted that morning.
James even did a ''Yay!
Jeff said that they had to do his skin graft over again because it didn't take the first time.
He said that he never got laid in the past either.
Jeff said that they had to do his skin graft over again because it didn't take the first time.
He said it would be very complicated.
He said that the people at Rescue Me sent him one as a gift and he thinks it looks really cool.
Artie said he knows the porno movies he has as well as he knows the Godfather movie.
Brandon said he thinks that she'll be okay with it.
Richard Christy came in a short time later and told the guys about how he has a storage place there in the city and he's got boxes full of Playboys in there.
Howard said that he just figured that they'd like to know.
Robin said she can't see it being a comfortable thing for Artie or the woman.
He just missed that one phone call that day.
Howard called JD in there to get him in this conversation.
He said it would be very complicated.
He said that came off as her being a phony.
He wondered if some day that moustache will come back into style.
Howard said that's really a creepy thing to do but she must have been really hot to have recovered from that kind of awful thing.
He said that he wants to open a bar where they have a firing range.
He said that he was having a bad day anyway and just slept through it.
He said he hated the Blackberry because the phone sucked so bad.
Howard said that the whole thing there is not to bother guests there but the owner thinks that it's okay for him to bother them.
He just missed that one phone call that day.
Artie said that they're going to be at this club out there and the chicks are going to be unreal.
Keith said that Artie could be a great father and he really believes that he could do a good job at it.
Keith if Artie could be a father over the phone.
JD came in so Howard told him to get some confidence and just talk to some chicks.
She said that what she's recommending to people won't kill them unless they abuse it.
Artie said that he's going to get JD some hot chick to bang him out there.
Brandon said that it is pretty much anything but Robin asked him if he'd have gay sex and he said probably not.
Howard said he wondered if he should grow out that Hitler moustache and show up on Letterman to tell him he's growing it to try and bring it back into style.
Robin said that JD was on his way to dying a virgin.
Robin mentioned JD and Howard still stuck with Fred.
He said that didn't last too long so they moved on and by the time the girls got up on stage in this strip club, he was done jerking off.
He read that Imus is looking to get back on the air but he can't imagine why the guy would want to keep working at that age.
Howard said it's crazy out there.
Howard said that they should have been there to do interviews, he would have loved to have spoken to the guy who played Cousin It.
Howard said that Ronnie is another one who was changed by the show.
Howard said that maybe they should have left that thing alone.
Keith said that Artie could be a great father and he really believes that he could do a good job at it.
He told him to tell Gary to turn up the temperature a cunt hair.
He said he ate most of it after she ate like one bite of the pancakes and one of the fries.
Howard said that Ronnie is another one who was changed by the show.
Howard said they have some bugs to work out on the phone but you can watch video and listen to it as a regular iPod.
Jeff said that he hasn't smoked a cigarette since Tuesday.
The caller asked Howard when they're going to have Valentina Vaughn back on the show.
They'll also try to figure out whose life has been changed the most by the show.
He read that Imus is looking to get back on the air but he can't imagine why the guy would want to keep working at that age.
Howard said he feels that his creepy factor is down compared to some guys.
He said that he likes some of the features it has but he's not sure he wants to get one.
Howard said he once asked Mark Chernoff to grow a Hitler moustache back when he was on K-Rock.
Ralph said he thinks he's done with Bubba at this point.
